It is over

Susan died Saturday morning. She was so very sick, but did not want to die on the January birthdays of her daughter or uncle. On Friday night her mother told her that all she had to do was make it past midnight. Georgetta Susan Walker Perry passed away at 8:30, Saturday morning, January 3, 2009. She leaves behind a husband, three children and four grandchildren. She was forty-nine.

I did go see her seven days prior. When I walked in she was lying in the living room in a bed hospice had provided. She was moaning and asking her husband of 32 years to hold her. Her face was so drawn that her teeth protruded like someone in a concentration camp. Her little legs hung out from under her gown, but she said she was hot and did not want them covered. The only way she was able to take any liquid was through a small dropper. Her husband used the dropper to drip morphine into her mouth every 30 minutes. I spoke to her about when we were little girls and about how we loved to read to each other. In a barely audible voice she said, "I still love to read."

They cremated her body and we had a memorial service for her today. Everyone looked dazed. My cousin Kevin spoke about his older sister. He didn't talk about her being a good person or how much he would miss her. He talked about how strong she was. And no one disagreed. Susan died in the same county where she had lived most of her life. She died by a window that looked out over a country road where horse and buggies trot by every few minutes. She died as she had lived, without complaint. Susan was a very strong woman who knew that her life would soon be over and she went through the process of dying with great strength and dignity.

Dear Susan,

Memories of you are flying through my mind and tonight I am crying for you. I pray you rest in peace.

Love always,

Janice