Always looking forward keeps you mentally busy and can be really tiresome. For some reason I've been under the impression that I will always have enough time in my life to do the things I want to do, so the planning in my head never stops. Growing older never seemed real, but now reality is setting in. I'm not that old, but boy does every day get a little harder.
I wonder about those people who are just sitting on their porch as you drive by in the country. They're not reading a book, not texting, not watching tv, and they don't look like they're getting ready to get up and go anywhere. Just sitting. They might raise their hand for a wave when they see someone pass by or on the other hand, there may be no indication that they notice anyone or anything around them. How do they do it? Maybe they're exhausted from hard work like everyone else, but they have sense enough to know when to recognize the need to stop pushing and call it a day.
I bet when you are able to sit and relax without constant interference, the days seem a little longer and the years don't whiz by. A sitters life might seem 20 or 30 years longer than one of the busy bees who must always be in motion. An extra 20 or 30 years might not be too bad, so maybe someday I'll stop and ask for a lesson in just sitting. It might not be easy, but I'm teachable.
Lovey